I’ve been hearing a lot of people talking about hearing tests lately. At least I think that’s what they’ve been saying. I can’t confirm since I’m finding myself struggling to hear people now and I haven’t had a test myself for about seven years. How often are we supposed to have a hearing test, and why don’t we know this as a matter of course? The schedule for everything else is made pretty clear – annual blood work and dental exam and mammogram. But hearing test?
Not only is it uncommon for people to regularly go for a hearing test, in my circles it seems slightly forbidden to even discuss it. Why are we so reticent to go and so comfortable in our naiveite about how often we should be going? We wait until people are so tired of us asking them to repeat themselves that our spouses plead with us, or our siblings try to bribe us, or our co-workers offer to accompany us to the hearing test just to get it done.
I went seven years ago because the grocery store clerk began to just point at first the plastic bag and second the paper bag, instead of asking me out loud which one I wanted. It’s because one time I asked her to repeat herself three times and I finally answered, ‘Surprise me.’ I figured that would likely get me out of the situation, given that I remained completely unsure of what she was saying. With the clanging around of carts and products, people chatting and overhead music playing, all within the huge and echoey store, I was at a complete loss.
So I went in for a hearing test. As far as I recall, it’s the only one I’ve ever had in my life, outside of quick checks at my regular doctor visit. But this was my first full meal deal of machines and inner chambers and tests, and the verdict is that I have perfectly normal hearing ‘for someone of my age.’ And that was seven years ago, so does the ‘perfectly normal’ grade keep being prorated with the advancing age?
I bit my dentist the other day, because I swear I heard him say ‘bite down’ but it may have been ‘open wide’. I figure it’s time to maybe revisit all those whirring gobbledygook hearing machines to make sure I’m still on track for being normal. At least as far as hearing goes!