My daughter said she was proud of me when I got home from a protest recently. Then she commented that we don’t tell adults enough that we’re proud of them. That we tell that to kids all the time, but we should also hear these things as adults. What a great idea!
There are lists published containing positive words of encouragement we should be sharing with kids, and ‘I’m so proud of you!’ is right at the top. Also notable are ‘I believe in you’, ‘Your opinion counts’, ‘Our family wouldn’t be the same without you’, ‘I’ll always be here for you’, ‘It’s okay to be afraid sometimes’, ‘That was a brave thing to do’, ‘You can accomplish anything’, ‘You were right’. The list goes on and on, and when I scanned it, I realized I do say some of those things to other adults. Regularly. There is always something positive or complimentary you can find to share with those around you, and it’s important to do it. Your words might be the one positive interaction they have that day.
I’ve also come to realize that my sense of well-being only exists if everyone around me shares it. If something fills me up that usually means there’s enough to share, whether it’s food or the energy to lend a helping hand. I began this column with the idea that sharing my thoughts and experiences about entering retirement might be helpful to other people. And, gauging by the great positivity received, I believe that was true. Thank you for sharing so many phrases that are on all the ‘positivity for children’ lists! It has been a privilege to have my words carried every week in the Advocate and I hope it might even have given some people new ideas on what it means to grow older.
For me, it’s time now to clear my slate a bit and allow some quiet space to answer the question ‘Now what will You have me do?’ I’m going to determine the right volunteer efforts to lend my time to, I’m going to read as voraciously as I did before all of life’s obligations took priority, and I’m going to try to say yes to every social invitation. I want to ‘keep it simple’ – not just my deeds, but also my thoughts. I want to lose myself in time and not let the clock guide the course of my day (this goal may take me the rest of my life to attain!).
I will miss writing this column for you. I will always see stories everywhere I look and it will be hard to break the habit of writing them down to share them here. There will always be important issues that I would like a platform to share my views on, like my great big fat hope that Alberta will always remain in Canada. Or that Paul Brandt’s initiative to raise awareness about human trafficking will be hugely impactful. Hmmm… maybe ‘not in my city’ will be my new volunteer role!
When I was sorting through the reams of notes I have kept over these few years to work their way into a column, I found a pretty funny scribble: ‘There has been an amalgamation on my face. My eye wrinkles are meeting up with the laugh lines around my mouth and will soon form one big municipality like Airdrie and Calgary.’ Before that happens, I want to move on to try other things.
There’s plenty of time for all of it, for all of us to keep learning. To keep being nice to one another. To only take what we need and share when we can. To choose joy. To make ourselves proud, of ourselves.
Happy trails, friends.
Sandy Bexon
(I am happy to share that I will be the Artist in Residence at Historic Markerville at Thanksgiving! Looking forward to focused writing time on a new project – a cookbook/history book for The Jungle Farm! Meanwhile, I’m enjoying the many events that take place at this very cool spot – check out Historic Markerville at this link!)
